October 13, 2014

ISIS and Pornography

Well I'm sure it's no surprise to anyone who follows the news that ISIS runs a pretty tight ship when it comes "morality". Roaming bands of "authorities" patrol the streets administering lashings and a good old fashioned tongue wagging when they see a female in the street who had the misfortune to expose her elbow.

For more info on this go here:
Woman in Syria With Undercover Camera Exposes Life Under ISIS in Syria

Now male jihadists have "needs" (nudge nudge wink wink) and for the lucky few jihadists who have liberated themselves a new wife those " needs" can be addressed. For the other men who find themselves with no prospect of any female companionship, and are considering strapping on a suicide vest just so they can meet Allah and the virgins, well they have resorted to pornography.

Yes that's right porn. It's seems the reach of porn knows no boundaries and even stretches into the territory currently controlled by ISIS. I have been able to get some photos of this "jihadist porn" so we can hope to gain some insight into this group.

ISIS approved pornography:

ISIS approved pornography

 ISIS Hardcore XXX Porn

ISIS - Hard Core Porn

Not sure after seeing this what insight if any we can gain from this  - perhaps I should just forward my info on to Obama and the Pentagon so they can learn about their new enemy....

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September 23, 2014

Cooking With ISIS

It seems there is more to ISIS then meets the eye.

It's true they aspire to claim religious authority over all of the Muslim world.
It's also true that they have established a caliphate or religious state.
ISIS has been very effective at spreading their propaganda through social media via some ghastly decapitation videos.

Maybe they will get some positive press with their take on the traditional Tomato and Cucumber Salad - MMM Refreshing......

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May 28, 2014

How I feel after a Grande Espresso at Starbucks

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September 21, 2013

A hooker, A bag of chips and $5

I was sitting parked in my car in a seedier part of town, the sun was going down and societies undesirables were emerging from their crack dens to prowl the streets. Say what you like about society's undesirables but they certainly have an entrepreneurial streak.  Sitting in my car I was offered some crack,meth, molly and a "date" with a toothless lady (?) called Sharon.

I politely declined any and all offers -
"No thank you sir I will not partake of your fine crack cocaine "
"Sorry Sharon I will respectfully decline your offer of a good time"

When I had a moment I sent a text to my wife telling her where I was. To my surprise she replied in a positive manner.

"There you are surrounded by $50 hookers and you with only $5 in your wallet" my wife said

I opened my wallet and my heart dropped when I saw the lone $5 bill in my wallet. She was right.

"This should be fun" my wife continued on " See what fun you can have for $5"

I could hear her laughing as I hung up the phone.

Here was my opportunity  to have a wild and crazy encounter. An encounter that has been endorsed by my wife. An encounter  that I could relive for years through conversation at the work place water cooler.

I talked to the local crack dealer,  and even though crack is a drug for the budget conscience junkie - he would not sell me his wares.

Sharon, even being toothless and having a blackeye "still had standards"

This was not looking good - would I have to tell my wife that she was right and I could not have fun in this den of decadence with $5???

Suddenly inspiration struck me.  I had my eureka moment. I knew how I could have fun for only $5

I slouched down in the front seat and  masturbated - then I went into the corner store and got a bag of chips and a Pepsi.

I can't wait to tell her that I won our bet.....

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